Monday
Published on January 26, 2004 By Ania McBeigh In Blogging
Today was rather icky. Doctors appointment early then had to pick up teh rest of my snake's medication. Then i ate myself silly... so much for dieting geez this weather i think makes us hungry. I feel fattened for teh kill lol. Atleast today is sunny.. snow in teh forecast tomorrow. I envy my husband who is in 70 degree temps down in San Antonio TX. His training is doing well. I talked to him last night. He is teh first in his class which is great. Still no idea where we will be stationed at. Our choices are Washington state, Lousiana, Maryland, Alaska, Hawaii and Germany. that it helps that much to know lol. But atleast some progress is being made. Hopefully i will know by teh end of this month. There are so many things to do so many calls to make i feel liek scraeming half teh time and teh pother half sleeping or running away. Its tough being away from your other half. I have terrible insomnia and just plain stress related illnesses. Nothing major but still affects my life wether i like it or not. Its strange i never thought anything liek this would affect me on such a deep level. I have always been able to sleep and insomnia is strange concept for me. I hate doing things seperate from him seeing movies and exploring new hiking trails or seeing pretty things liek sunsets and cute puppies at teh pet store. Makes me ache very deeply not being able to share those simple everyday beauties that i took for grantedbefore. so manythings i wsih for at night noone to hold onto, bad dreams stay nightmarish, life seems like a hassle and people distant and not really part of reality. Atleast this part of teh training we get phone calls. During boot camp we wre eextremely seperated from each other just letters and those were only when allowed. He got to come home in december for 10 days. What an incredible tease. Letting go was so much harder than teh first time. Probably because i knew what was comeing.. and teh loss seemed greater. I had him for a while here to hold to loveand i had to let go all over again. Phone calls are times to keep teh tears down and in check teh sadness is unbearable for us both but we see an end now and that makes teh difference. March 2nd he graduates and i join him soon there after.. atleast now i get to be there for our one year anniversary on March 29th. I am so happy for that, i wa sreally scared it wouldn't happen and we would haveto spend that vital part of our lives reminscing elsewhere and away when really this was our day. Enough of my whining for today haha. But you never know teh pains of love till u have it. Take care all. Off to petstore to buy dinner for my snake.
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